So what else can I really say this week except “good luck America”?

I bet you’re all a bit sick of hearing about the old Trumpster now?

I had to mention it to somebody though. I mean, this is even bigger than Brexit!

Heaven knows I’m lacking in real-life friends to converse with so unfortunately, dear readers, you’re going to be forced to listen to my nonsensical rants and questionable opinions.

First off, I’m not worried that the dude with the toupée got elected.

There were shots of young Americans crying hysterically on the TV after the news came in.

I must have been one of the few people that actually broke down in hysterics.

As I watched the climax of months and months of bizarre campaigning unfold over BBC News 24, I couldn’t contain what I have dubbed the laugh-cry-die.

I’ve copyrighted that by the way.

It’s the name for my stage of humour: laugh uncontrollably, so much so that you cry and so much so that you may die.

I’m not worried because, despite the fact that they’re Republicans, Donald Trump’s advisors are not unintelligent people and will be breaking their necks to keep him in check.

He had free rein on the campaign trail, but surely now he’s President-elect we shouldn’t be hearing anymore untoward recordings taken inside motor homes.

The result was like the ending of a comedy film.

I was expecting a recently- disgraced Jim Carrey to jump out and try flogging cheap plane tickets to Canada.

Bigoted, judgmental, bad hair and with no social boundaries, I sat clutching my cuppa as liberal America’s fears became a harsh reality.

The great U S of A obviously saw something in him, though.

It must have been all this talk about the wall.

Maybe our American cousins just really like the idea of having their own Great Wall of China-esque wonder.

Or maybe it was actually the Mexicans who rigged the election in the hope that it would keep Trump out of Mexico.

If I’m honest, that’s all I can remember from his election campaign, that and the fact he wanted Hillary Clinton locked up – was it something to do with mobile phones and internet?

Whether Hillary was a better choice for president isn’t for me to say.

I’m more of a Geordie Shore commentator, not a political one.

What I can say though is that Hillary would have been nowhere near as entertaining as Trump.

Although I’m guessing he will be gagged and edited at every turn, I just know for a fact that we’re going to be treated to some trips, loud ties and even more exciting hairstyles.

In years to come there are going to be pictures of all the iconic presidents on the front of history books – Lincoln in his hat, Washington scratching his nipple under his jacket and Trump rocking the backcombed-blow-dried-within-an-inch-of-its-life look.

I’ll be honest, if he was over here he would get my vote.

The only thing worse than an unstable person is a dull one.